I am one month, 2 days and 7 hours into motherhood while writing this…
And let me tell you, I already feel like a “seasoned” mother.
In the last 24 hours, I have been peed on, spit up on, had pee spray on the wall during a diaper change, changed a “blowout”, stayed up into the wee hours of the night with a crying baby, picked baby boogers, walked with other moms, went to a mom group, tried to sooth an inconsolable baby, tried to eat while feeding and spilled tomato sauce on my son’s face, etc. etc. etc. The list can go on and on.
Motherhood takes over your life…
When being admitted to the hospital, they ask you, “how is having this baby going to change your life?” I thought it was a stupid question. I responded with “completely.”
I don’t think I understood the magnitude of ‘completely.’ My life is FOREVER changed by this little man…every second of my life is changed by this little man.
The other day, my friend wrote on facebook how weird it is to see all her friends post baby pictures. I responded with how it weirded me out, too, and I have a baby. It is so strange to one day not be pregnant, then you have a baby growing inside of you, then 10 months later, hello baby!
And, you know what, this baby takes over your world, but it makes you so much of a better person. You have to be selfless, literally giving yourself every two hours to a hungry baby – even two or three times in the middle of the night. You lose your pride when you walk home from a beautiful walk for six or seven blocks with a screaming baby; or when they spit up or pee all over you; or your once-skinny-stretchmark-free-body is now covered in stretch marks and has, let’s just say, some extra padding (everywhere!!!). I won’t mention all the other gross things that happen to your body when you’ve delivered a baby.
But regardless of the stretchmarks and extra padding, how beautiful. Bringing a new life into this world. Caring and nurturing a precious gift that Jesus gave us. Developing his character. Seeing him grow.
It has given me such a beautiful view of God. Never in a million years could I imagine giving sweet Jackson to die for a world who rejected me and hates me, to pay their debt for the mistakes they made. It blows my mind. His grace amazes me. And how fitting that Jackson’s name means, “God has been gracious; shown favor.” Jackson is our little reminder of how gracious God has been to us. How undeserving we are of that favor. How lavishly he extended that grace. How loving and mighty he is.
Thank you Jesus for forever changing our lives. Thank you for being gracious. Thanks for this gift named Jackson that we don’t deserve.
“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change,” James 1:17, ESV.
Photography by the wonderful Bekah Sonke Creative
sarahecooley.com 
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This resonated so much with me! Isn't it so crazy how literally EVERYTHING changes? All I could think about when I held my little man for the first time was how full of love my heart was! And how this is probably the closest I will ever feel to the way God loves us and even then it's still immeasurably more! God has never felt more real to me than he does now that I'm a mother. He has been so faithful (and gracious as you so perfectly out it) to us. It's just all such a miracle. Good luck on this journey into motherhood! It's already a bit messy but I wouldn't change a second of it! 🙂
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Well put babe!! Mirror. 😉
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