Category: Wisdom

An update : Classes, the Bible, and dear friends…

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I couldn’t sleep, so I decided instead of trying to shut up all the thoughts running through my mind, I would blog about them.

This past week has been absolutely wonderful. Among just spending great, quality time with some amazing friends, the Lord has been teaching me so much and through many different things.

One of the main things is through my classes. I am learning SO much about who Christ is, why I believe what I believe, what cultural things I have allowed to spill into my every day thoughts and choices, etc. I have been seriously blessed to have the professors that I have, specifically Dr. Lewis and Dr. Stokes. They have been so instrumental in everything I am learning. They have challenged me and reshaped what I thought Christianity was. They have not allowed me to be content with just “being” but have showed me the significance of reading/knowing scripture and interpreting it correctly, of looking at culture through the lens of scripture and determining if something is biblical or not, and of not looking to culture to shape my christianity and my life but to scripture to shape and inform my life and decisions.

Another thing that has made the last week so wonderful was a tool that my dear friend Jordan showed me. It is the Grant Horner Bible Reading System. Basically, you read 10 chapters of the Bible a day. He set it up strategically so that you read 10 chapters from the Old testament (Law, prophets, wisdom literature) and the New Testament (Gospels, Epistles, Early Church records[Acts]). It is also split up so that you read list 1-5 in the morning and list 6-10 in the evening [HA, well, usually the evening for me ends up being the early morning – 12:30AM or 1AM ;)]. This has been so beneficial and it honestly is so easy. It takes about 20-30 minutes max to read through the five chapters, but it is something that just honestly fills your cup (for lack of a better phrase). I was feeling so spiritually dry for about three months. I would sit down to read and my mind would automatically wander. I would be stressed out and rude to the people I loved around me. My mind was filled with crude jokes – and unfortunately they exited my mouth for the world to hear! I was honestly just in such a horrible place, living life to just graduate and move on from this place (my university). This week has been everything but those last few things that I have mentioned. I have clarity of my future, a mind filled with the Word rather than crude jokes, a desire for love and peace for the people around me, and so much more. I am so thankful for this tool.

One final thing I am thankful for are my dear friends – Alli, Tiffany, and Taylor. They have become some of my very best friends this year. They have seen some pretty nasty and ugly sides of me, but honestly, I think that is what has been so beautiful about our friendship. Our relationships are real. They get down to the nitty-gritty. There is an openness to our relationships. We can be honest; we can be vulnerable. Our friendships are a safe-zone. There is also critique and confrontation. There is an openness to share our frustrations and struggles. For so long after the events of the past year of my life, I struggled with how I was going to trust again, how I was going to open up. These friendships have taught me how to be vulnerable again, how to love, how to forgive, how to be honest and open. These girls are seriously AMAZING and so beautiful. And the men they are going to marry someday are honestly going to be the luckiest men on this planet. =)

Anyways, that is a little sneak peak into my life as of late. I have been overjoyed with the growth that has been opened up to me. I am thankful daily for the grace that the Lord has shown me over and over again in my life; I just hope I can show a fraction of that grace to those around me. Lord, help me to live to serve you and to show grace and mercy to those around me. Help me to exemplify you!

To Be Continued… =)

My thoughts for the night… challenged.

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This is an article I read tonight…It challenged me. Here were my immediate thoughts:

I don’t completely agree with all that was written, but she brings up so many good points in this post. These lines challenged me:
“Dear men: If you believe my neckline is causing to stumble, you have bought into the lie that women are the problem, NOT YOUR LUST. 


Dear women: If you believe you are responsible for your fellow man’s sins, you have bought into the lie that YOU are the problem, NOT SIN.“

Though, I believe that it is responsible of women to guard your bodies because they are precious, it is a good point that we need to address. Is the idea of modesty for men, women, or God? Are we deciding to protect our bodies because we desire to honor Christ with them, or are we solely covering our bodies because we don’t want to cause our brother to stumble because he is lazy and isn’t taking the necessary steps toward purity? These are my thoughts and questions, not my beliefs, just to clarify. I am still processing.

A Definition of Beauty – Sociology Paper

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So I am posting a paper I wrote for my Sociology of Gender class. This is not a complete thought yet, and I have a long way to go before it is, but I thought I would post it and see what the blog world thought and if you had any other thoughts or statements to add. Enjoy!

A Definition of Beauty
            The American culture has come a long way since its’ freedom from Britain in 1776. Then, America’s biggest concern was freedom from oppressive rulers and a desire to choose. America has taken that to an extreme and freedom is now the right to do anything, even if that right impedes other’s freedom. That which is right and correct is based on feelings and perspective rather than an ultimate answer.
            According to Mead’s theories of how people develop and understand their own reality – Symbolic Interactionism and Social Construction of Reality – a person develops their understanding of something, albeit culture or a social ‘norm’, by looking at their society or culture (example: family, community, general society) (Holmes, 2008, p. 41-53). A person who grows up in a certain culture has a certain opinion about an ideology based on that culture’s opinion of it.
            This idea can be seen in one of the latest movies by Tate Taylor’s The Help depicting the life of “the help” in America in the 1960s. Throughout the history of America, the issue of slavery had loomed over our country even after Abraham Lincoln had issued the Emancipation Proclamation in 1863 and well after into the 1960s and later. Though the African Americans in America were just as human as the Caucasians, there is a stigma that in some areas (and families) in America still presides.
            This can be explained through Mead’s Social Construction of Reality and Symbolic Interactionism theories, though there are exceptions. He explains that throughout life, people look to others to understand what is generally right; those who are looked to as examples are termed as “the generalized other.”  Mead believes that “we take into account what is socially acceptable in deciding how to behave” (Holmes, 2008, p. 42). An exception to this theory is in The Help: the character Skeeter Phelan is surrounded by a culture that deems “the help” as less significant. They are looked down upon in their society. Skeeter makes her decisions about “the help” by her own understanding of them in her own household. She defines them as significant and real human beings.
            In regards to beauty, the common phrase “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” is a well-meaning term, though it misses an important key to beauty. In Skeeter’s society, beauty that is held by her friends was defined as ‘other white people who gave them what they wanted without getting in their way.’ This definition is proved to be wrong throughout the storyline of the movie. But, this definition and other definitions like it say something about society in general and beauty within that society. According to Mead, people construct beauty or ideologies based on their understanding of their culture; this has been proved to be true (with few exceptions, like Skeeter of The Help).
            Another great example of this is The Miss America Pageants (from the Documentary watched in Sociology of Gender). Throughout the entirety of the film, beauty was based on a set of rules and regulations that needed to be met by the contestants. A (rough) quote from the film stated just this: “Pageants are fascinating because at the end of the night, someone does win. There are a set of rules that constitute beauty.” Beauty, though this should not be, is defined by what the general population decides it to be – whether that is correct or incorrect, fair or unfair, just or unjust.
            When Lenora Slaughter joined the Miss America Pageant committee to ensure “fairness” and that “morals” were kept, she wrote up a set of rules. Rule number seven was that the contestants be of “good health and of the white race.” This rule alone showed the extreme bias and misunderstanding of beauty by Slaughter in and of itself.
            Beauty cannot be defined by outward qualities. Though outward qualities can categorize people into different sects (ethnicity, overweight/underweight, short/tall, etc.), one of those sects cannot be beauty (beautiful/ugly). Because “beauty”, in the general sense regarding cultures perception of it, is left to be determined by society, there must be a more narrowly-defined definition that takes popularity and preference out. When popularity and preference are left within that definition, beauty becomes subjective. That defines people – “the help” in the 1960s and women around America in regards to the Miss America Pageants – as ugly or as something to be discarded. That definition of beauty is near unattainable and unjust.
            Simply, beauty can be defined as being human. To have life, to have breath, is beauty. The first cry of a baby just out of a mother’s womb is beauty. A person living the entirety of their life and sharing their wisdom with someone younger is beauty. Being human has its’ own definition. A human breathes, lives, interacts, relates, creates, learns, comprehends, prospers, hurts, heals, and eventually dies. A human life from birth to death, in itself, is beauty because it spreads across any race, religion, and culture. In the Middle East, women (though very different from Americans) still desire and want the same things as American women: they want to be stylish and trendy; they want the boys in their classes to notice them; they want a college education and career; they want a family and lots of children.
            My ISP team leader, Amy Foote, said while in Jordan a quote that I will always remember and that will always stick out to me. She said, “Women are women are women are women.” This statement can be applied to humanity as a whole as well: people are people are people are people.” No matter where you go, people want and desire the same things. Humanity in its’ simplest form is beautiful because race, ethnicity, and culture do not interfere with it; it is what it is.
            Beauty within The Help and in The Miss America Pageants is defined solely based on societies perception of it, but those societies are missing the bigger picture. Beauty, as they say, is more than skin deep. Beauty is not popularity or preference. Beauty is humanity. Beauty is life. 
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To say I had a great Valentines Day would be a major understatement.

Here are several examples:

Yes, my valentines day included all the things I have gotten the last 3 years of my life at CBU on Valentines day: Chocolate, flowers, delicious dinner, people I LOVE, romantic music, smiles, and laughter. 
But, it was way better than the last 3 years of my life because I didn’t have the expectation for them to happen, and in fact, expected for them to not happen. Yesterday was a pleasant surprise. 
Thank you Lord for the gift of relationship and for ordaining it at the beginning of time at creation. Thank you for such a beautiful community filled with beautiful women to live in for the next 10 1/2 weeks till graduation. Thank you for your beautiful creation to enjoy. Thank you for grace and redemption. 
To Be Continued… =)

Worth It

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I have nothing long or inspiring to post today (or time to do either), just a small quote my friend posted on facebook that pierced straight to the middle of my heart:

“Jesus is wild and radical, and when we follow Him, he will lead us to places we would probably not go otherwise, although they will always be worth it!”

This is exactly the last year of my life in a sentence. Love it!
To Be Continued… =)

Footnote: I went on a 2 mile run yesterday and a 4 mile walk today. Who wants to join me in getting fit and healthy this year? 

Almond Blossoms….

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I’m starting a new journal today…
the front cover of my new journal – love it!
 I thought this to be fitting being January 1st and all.
The journal I am starting is called the ‘Almond Blossom Journal’ and it had a little explanation as to what it symbolizes:
“‘Happiness: it lies in the joy of achievement, in the thrill of creative effort.’ -Vincent Van Gogh
Symbolizing new, invigorating, budding life, Vincent Van Gogh’s Branch of an Almond Tree in Blossom (1890) inspires our creative souls to bloom.”
Though this explanation was a little corny and maybe a little new age, I believe it describes quite well how I know this year is going to be. I always think of the analogy of the seed and how the seed must first die before it can produce new life. Just like the almond blossom that is creating new life, it first had to start out as a seed that first had to die so that one day in its’ future it could produce life in each new bud that formed.This is a perfect description of my life this last year and this year to come.
I have gone through quite the journey this last year in my life. I have traveled through the lowest valleys and to the highest peaks, all the while crushing the sin that I clung to, killing it, and creating in me new life. I am still going through that crushing process and wonder if it will ever end (which it probably won’t in this lifetime until I’m with Christ) but I know that this pain and hardship that occurs is for my benefit and it is to create in me a new person filled with Christ and his love, redeemed by the grace he has given me. I am thankful! 

Jesus, thank you!
Here’s to a great year ahead…cheers to 2012!
To Be Continued… =)

Recap of 2011

Published on by Sarah E. Cooley2 Comments

I thought about going through each month of the last year and posting pictures of each month and write a little about what I did. The only problem with that is the last year of my life has been so full that I do not remember what happened when. So, I am separating my life this last year into sections rather than months. Enjoy!

Beginning of the year- I welcomed the new year with joy and great expectation for what was going to come in my life. I knew that something was around the corner but I was unsure of what it was. I started my last semester of my junior year.

Beginning about February, my life began to take some changes. My boyfriend at the time and myself decided to take a break, regroup after that month, and reevaluate our relationship. I began to hang out with my staff more often and pour into those relationships, began to be more involved with the youth group I was a leader of, began to pour more into my studies and focus on school, and most importantly, I began to pour my heart into the word and began to glean from those older and wiser than me on where the Lord should take my life next.

That month was one of the best months of my life. The Lord taught me so much! He revealed sin in my life that I had ignored, that I had chosen to neglect, and showed me how to reverse it (still working on that even a year later). It really was a sweet time of brokenness and surrender to the Lord. My heart was opened up to so much and freed from a lot that I had never given to the Lord.

I spent the rest of that semester enjoying the time I had as an RA in University Place with the amazing women that the Lord had placed on my staff. I finished planning events, working on papers and taking exams, and spending quality time with friends who were graduating and moving on from CBU.

In May, my former boyfriend and I decided to finally split. He left for the summer and I started work for the summer. The Lord used a time that could have been devastating and disastrous to such a sweet and intimate time with Him. I had some very low points, but they were covered with joy in hope in a savior who had provided for the biggest need – my utter and deep sin. I spent the summer learning and growing,  finding joy in singleness, finding out what my identity was in Christ, and who he created me to be.

I spent the summer working as a receptionist, hanging out with friends, going to youth group, small group, accountability group, singing on the worship team, and whatever other ministry I could get my hands on with all my extra time (such great times!!!!). I went to several weddings, a half a dozen or so beach trips/bonfires, pool side days with friends, moved from one house to the other, celebrated Matt and Bekah’s birthday, dinner/ice cream/coffee with friends, BBQs, went to the movies a ton, went to the drive-in, etc, etc, etc. I had a full summer all the while learning and growing so much about my savior and getting to know my church body as a single person. It was an amazing time!!!

August soon came and I moved into the dorms and began training for RA. I got to be apart of a staff that has blessed my life more than I ever could have imagined with friendships that will last a lifetime and sisters who I am indebted to forever.

The end of August came and I got to meet all of the beautiful residents I had been preparing for and praying for all summer. After quite a full year, those girls were a gift that I could not even explain. I have grown to love each one in their own way. Each a special gift from the Lord to me to continue the healing and growing process in my life.

This semester was filled with a gift a day under my pillow (pictures bellow), late night conversations till 3AM, early morning classes, events to Casey’s Cupcakes and the Mission Inn, beach bonfires with the Hall, monday duty nights, class after class with Taylor =), many disneyland trips, my first adult trip to Seattle to visit Emily, lunch dates and coffee dates with friends, bought my first car, and so much more. It has been a such full, unexpected (in a good way) semester and I am looking forward to my last semester of college. I am so thankful that the Lord has provided and protected for me in more ways than I can count. I am so thankful that the Lord’s plans are better than mine. I am so thankful for this year of growth and learning! I am just thankful for 2011. It is a year that I will always hold a special place in my heart for so many reasons.

Enjoy the pictures (there are a LOT)!!!!

RA staff ~ 2010-2011

Kelly and I – Sarah and Kris Corso Wedding

Ashley and I – Corso Wedding

Bekah, Ashley, and I – Corso Wedding

Kelly and I in our natural state 😉

Sarah Corso and I – Her wedding =)

Sam, Sarah, and I

Paula, Charlene, and I – Spring Semester 2011

Disneyland with Sarah Trout and Liz Hild – Spring break 2011

Emily made me breakfast for my birthday – March 27th, 2011

UP RA staff retreat – March 25-27, 2011

Staff retreat at Lucille’s BBQ – March 2011

The youth group surprised Jen (my bday twin) and I with birthday desserts

Birthday gift – my favorite slippers – March 2011

Summer Starbucks and grocery runs with Mamaw

Kayla and I made Emily a ‘Welcome Home’ sign

Summer BBQ with the small group

Breakfast with Jen and Becca before church

Summer shakes from Chick-fil-a

Movie nights with Emily, Kayla, and Matt

Love these two!!

Sunrise

Sunset

beach bonfire

My sister finally came home from Russia – Summer 2011

While moving, I found many old pictures

Sisters

Beach bonfire – Summer 2011

Kate exhausted after moving – summer 2011

beach bonfire – summer 2011

Kayla at her summer beach house – summer 2011

Emily, Kayla, and I

Amy and I at Olive Garden – Summer 2011

yummy drinks – summer 2011 
Ashley and I eating yummy purple icecream – summer 2011

One of the many pool side days – summer 2011

my love, Kate

Date with Amy to Basken Robins

My best friend Taylor and I – Clash n’ bowl Fall 2011

Breakfast with Emily before she left for Seattle

Sweet, sweet quiet times – summer 2011
first gift under my pillow – fall 2011

gift under my pillow – fall 2011

beach bonfire with 1C – September 2011

gift under my pillow – fall 2011

gift under my pillow – fall 2011

Kate in all her beauty

gift under my pillow – fall 2011

hanging out in the box with Jim and Paige – fall 2011

gift under my pillow – fall 2011

gift under my pillow – fall 2011

making signs with the ladies of 1C – fall 2011

gifts under my pillow – fall 2011

shopping with Bon Bon and the hall at Target

The 1C mascot

Jenta and Weezer

pretty in pink

my residents made my bed, so sweet

Simmon’s Hall Fall Pajama Ball – September 2011

scary drive to disneyland

Jordan and I in Disneyland – Fall 2011

Precious Quiet Times – Fall 2011

crocheting  

one of the many, many, many coffee’s I consumed Fall semester 

Kugel Walk soon to happen in May 2012

pretzel bread from briscos

coffee on the way to Seattle

Colbie Concert in Seattle with Emily

Brian and Sarah – soon to be Mr. and Mrs. – Seattle, WA

Emily and I at Jai Thai Restaurant in Seattle, WA

yum!

on the way home

yum yum yum

my welcome back sign

My youth girls – Valentine’s Dinner – Spring 2011

Fellow Youth Leaders – Valentines Dinner – Spring 2011

My sweet friend Andrea and I – Valentines Dinner

Photoshoot – Spring 2011

Photoshoot – Spring 2011

Photoshoot – Spring 2011

Photoshoot – spring 2011

Photoshoot – Spring 2011

Photoshoot – Spring 2011

Liz, Sarah, and I at Disneyland – Spring break 2011

Sarah Almost-Frausto and I at disneyland – spring break 2011

Rose Ceremony – Simmon’s Staff for 2011-2012

Matt and I at Carissa and Stanton’s Wedding – Summer 2011

Some of the fam – Callaway Wedding – summer 2011

Callaway wedding – summer 2011

friends who I have grown to love – fall 2011

Love these girls – fall 2011

Emily and I – Seattle – Fall 2011 
Gum wall – Seattle, WA – October 2011

View of Seattle Skyline from Kerry Park – October 2011

Seattle, WA – October 2011

Julia and I at Youth Summer camp – Summer 2011

Youth girls and I – Summer 2011

Andrea and I – Summer 2011

Res Life wedding reception – RA Training August 2011

Kelly and I – Res Life wedding reception- RA training August 2011

Res Life wedding reception – RA training August 2011

Bekah and I – August 2011

1C girls at Simmons Hall Fall Pajama Ball – Fall 2011

Some of the girls and I at FBC Norco – Summer 2011

Jess and I – Yule – December 2011

Liz and I – Yule – December 2011

Jess and I – Yule – December 2011

Miss CBU and I – Yule – December 2011 

Jess and I – Yule – December 2011

Jess and I – Yule – December 2011

Bekah and I – Yule – December 2011

Tyler and I – Yule – December 2011

Tyler and I – Yule – December 2011

To Be Continued… =)

I thought I loved you then…

Published on by Sarah E. Cooley1 Comment

There is a song that I just love by Brad Paisley entitled “Then.”

The song talks about the girl he is in love with and how the first night he saw her he was “mesmerized” by her. He sings about each step in life with her and how after each step he says, “I thought I loved you then.” He talks about his future with this woman and all the milestones they will soon reach and then sings one of my favorite lines: “What I can’t see is how I’m ever gonna love you more, but I’ve said that before”

I used to sing this to a man and meant it when I sang it. But, as time has gone by I realized now how this song would better be sung in light of the fact that down the line, those relationships end (whether by death or a sever in the relationship of whatever sort). I am not trying to be debbie-downer – bear with me.

I was singing it this morning to myself and was thinking how I could say that line to the Lord at each milestone of my life that I have crossed: “I thought I loved you then.” My whole life, since I stood in the corner of my family’s kitchen with my brother leading me in the sinner’s prayer, I have said that I loved the Lord. But, with each year that passes, I understand more and more about who I am as a person (sinful to the core) and my deep, deep need for a savior to cleanse me of all of my sins. Each time I step one foot into the word or take a look at my life, I realize how great God is and how helpless I am without Him.

As I spent my time singing that song about a relationship that was soon fleeting, I can look back on my life to a relationship that is unfailing and will never end because that relationship is led by the Lord who is perfect, who is everlasting, and who will never fail me. The Lord has governed and led my life with goodness and faithfulness. He has never led me anywhere that was too difficult for me to handle, but promises me that through His strength, I can do all things. My outlook on that fleeting relationship was wrong; that love would increase in time as it should, yes, but it was not the end-all of my life. My life is worth so much more than a fleeting relationship or crush on a guy. I can deeply love as a human being to other human beings, but it must be in the appropriate view of who I am in comparison of who God is. God is the one who will never fail me, not some guy or even my friends. I view people in this sense and love them with a love that Christ loved me: in humility, grace, and forgiveness. I pray that in the future after the moment that I press the “publish post” button that I can live out what was written above to the glory of God.

I desire to love deeply with another human being, but I desire to love the Lord even deeper. I desire to understand better who Christ has made me to be and to live that out to the fullest. I desire to look at my sin, the ugly, disgusting, and grotesque sin, that is in my life and be able to see better the grace that the Lord has lavished on me. I pray that this can become possible in my life.

To Be Continued… =)


Side note: To make this clear, by posting about past relationships I have been apart of, in no way am I pointing out failures of those individuals in order to make myself look better. I am just as sinful as the next person and need the grace of Christ just as much if not more than they do. The severing of those relationships has been more my fault than any one of theirs. I hope that those reading this blog can look at my past relationships and not see failure, but can see them as I see them: governed and ruled by the Lord for his glory even despite my faults and sins within them.

sick beds and prison cells

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This spoke straight to my discontent heart this morning:
“Thank Me for the conditions that are requiring you to be still. Do not spoil these quiet hours by wishing  them away, waiting impatiently to be active again. Some of the greatest works in My kingdom have been done from sick beds and prison cells. Instead of resenting the limitations of a weakened body, search for My way in the midst of these very circumstances. Limitations can be liberating when your strongest desire is living close to ME. 
    Quietness and trust enhance your awareness of My Presence with you. Do not despise these simple ways of serving Me. Although you feel cut off from the activity of the world, your quiet trust makes a powerful statement in spiritual realms. My Strength and Power show themselves most effective in weakness.”
~Sarah Young in “Jesus Calling”
Saw this on Jana Mikels’ Blog. Enjoy!! ❤


To Be Continued… =)