Category: Wisdom

“Behold, you have made my days a few handbreadths, and my lifetime is as nothing before you. Surely all mankind stands as a mere breath! Selah.” Psalm 39:5

This morning, I woke up like any other day. Had my coffee and granola, read my bible and scribbled prayers frantically in my journal to the Lord. Brushed my teeth and put my make up on. Talked with my roommate and then headed off to work, surprisingly on time.

I turned on 102.7 to listen to Ryan Seacrest in the morning. The first thing he says is “devastating news for Colorado.”

My heart sank.

I thought it could have been something political or something to do with the wild fires that have been hovering over the state. I somehow knew this was not the case.

I listen on and hear of the horrible news of a lone-gunman killing 13 movie-goers and injuring many, many others while watching the midnight premier of the newest Batman movie.

I then heard my phone go off. My roommate texts me and says “There was a massive shooting in colorado.” We shared a couple of shocked text messages back and forth while I was sitting in traffic.

I have gone to countless midnight premiers. Always thinking about how excited I was about seeing the movie. Never in my life would I anticipate losing my life while going to one. It could have been anyone.

One of my favorite books in the Bible is Ecclesiastes – some have mocked me for this since it talks about death, the ending of seasons, and finality – but there is something that is comforting about the passage at the end of chapter 3 when the writer writes, “God has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men, yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end” (verse 11). All life on earth has an ending. We will all breathe our last breath. Yet, it is not finished here.

God has set eternity in the hearts of man, yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.

In moments of disaster and remembrances of the fragility of life, we have a God who remains faithful through it all. Caring and comforting and wanting all to call upon his name.

As God always does, he provides the right verses at just the right time…comforting us with his word. Last week, I read through the first part of Philippians 1. Verse 6 brings me so much confidence in the Lord today:

“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ (Philippians 1:6 ESV).”

 We have confidence in Christ that his good work will be completed – not just in the believers in Philippi, but for all believers and his entire creation. We can have confidence even when disasters like the one that happened early this morning occur that God’s good work will be completed. We can trust that though people constantly fail and hurt other human beings (like I am so guilty of doing day in and day out – maybe not murder, but nonetheless with hate and selfish actions) that he is still faithful.

God’s good news doesn’t end because of one man’s insanity. His control doesn’t end because bad things occur and the world feels like chaos is winning out. He is faithful and in his time he will make all things beautiful.

We cannot fathom what God is doing from beginning of time, to the end of time.

So, I have been recently studying Philippians 1 and the Lord is teaching me SO much through His word.

Today, as I was reading, I was thinking about all the things that are going on in my life right now. Transitioning from Riverside to Orange County, entering the job world and leaving 17ish years of schooling behind, living at school to living in an apartment with a roommate with rental payments, bills, etc. I also go to thinking about how I view people. Recently, I have been struggling with my own timeline. The thoughts constantly run through my head as to why I am single in this season in life, why my timeline isn’t how I pictured it to be out of college, why I decided to leave a place where I knew so many people to Orange county where I am having to meet new people, get connected to a new church, etc. etc. etc. All that to say, contentment has been a HUGE struggle in my life in the last couple of months since graduation.

Anyways…back to Philippians…I was reading this morning and going over the question “what can I learn from the example of others?” and I came across these verses (1:7-8): “It is right for me to feel this way about you all, because I hold you in my heart, for you are all partakers with me of grace, both in my imprisonment and in the defense and confirmation of the gospel. For God is my witness, how I yearn for you all with the affection of Christ Jesus.” Many times because I am so focused on the next move in my life, I forget to view people as children of God and with the affection of Christ. I view them as pawns in the chess game of my life. I view people as a means to get me somewhere else, rather than how I can love and serve them like Christ does. Paul David Tripp recently posted a quote on facebook that I felt was very accurate to how I have viewed relationships in the past; he said, 

“Maybe you’re attracted to that person, not because you love them, but because you love yourself and you love what they’ll do for you.”

I have been mulling over what it means to yearn for people with the affection of Christ since I started this study. I don’t know if my answer is theologically correct or if I am adding my own interpretation into it, but I do know that to yearn for someone with the affection of Christ does not include selfish motives in how to advance my own self. Usually, it means that I will give up and sacrifice my own well-being/self in order to uplift them and bring them closer to Christ. 

What do you believe Paul is trying to say in this passage? How can you learn from Paul’s example of yearning after the Philippians with the affection of Christ?

To Be Continued… 🙂 

sidenote: I do love my job, my new apartment, singleness, my new church, etc…but, it has been a struggle not to get discouraged in the slow progress of moving into a new area and meeting new people…

“Cycle of Commitment”

“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6 ESV).

To Be Continued… 🙂

I have discovered in the last several weeks of my life that I really enjoy history. I love discussing the “politics” of various issues. I love seeing a different side to things than most people see. I love reading historical fiction. I love googling people’s names and seeing what I can find out about them. I love researching and discovering.

Before I go somewhere, I usually have asked all the questions I can about the place as well as researching via the internet in my own time. Before meeting someone or shortly after meeting them, I usually Facebook stalk (read the definition here) them to see what they are all about (it’s crazy what you can find out about a person via Facebook – don’t act like you don’t do it too… haha). Before I buy something, I research reviews that people have said about a certain product. I reread labels on the back of shampoo and conditioner while in the shower, and the box of cereal that I am eating from in the mornings at breakfast. I love watching TV shows that give me a glimpse into someone’s life – the Bachelor/Bachelorette, American Idol, Dancing with the Stars, Big Brother, Survivor, etc.

I like to be ‘in the know’. I don’t know what sparked this in me, but I suspect that I get it from my father (read this post).

Recently I began reading the Hunger Games series. I have fallen in love. Not only is the books’ setting in ‘future America’ (so interesting!!), but it goes into detail about the flaws of American culture and our desire to exploit someone else for the entertainment of ourselves (i.e. reality television).  I happen to be an extreme fanatic of reality television. Every monday (well, tuesday, since I’m not able to watch it on monday) I look forward to watching the Bachelorette. Sometimes, like this weeks episode, I re-watch it (haha woops, did I just write that?!).

The idea of this book struck a chord in me. Though, I’ll probably continue to watch the Bachelorette and other such TV shows, I have a new perspective on them. Instead of viewing them as another reason to mindlessly get lost in a one to two hour show, I now view them as people. They are not just some device to cause drama and be the next tabloid on the newsstands for my entertainment, but they are real people, with real emotions, who are going through crazy things, just so that I can have some entertainment. What a different perspective.

History, one of the things I love, is happening right in front of us. Suzanne Collins, the writer of hunger games, has done an excellent job at ‘predicting’ the future of America (the history that has yet to happen) and explaining her frustrations with our culture. The decisions I make to watch the Bachelorette and tweet about it and say “I hate so and so” or “that person is a jerk” are not just comments drifting through the air. They are comments made toward real people, with real feelings, and real emotions. I don’t think reality TV is altogether horrible, but I think I definitely want to have a different perspective on the things I say and who I flippantly put down with my words.

Katniss, Peeta, and Gale 🙂 – Hunger games

Emily Maynard – The Bachelorette 🙂

To Be Continued… 🙂

Being that it’s father’s day, I suppose I should write a post about my dad. 🙂

My dad has taught me so much.

This is my changing a tire this morning…on father’s day!

He taught me to whistle entire songs, how to sing, how to throw a softball, how to change a flat tire, how to sing like louis armstrong, how to squeak with my lips, how to properly eat sunflower seeds (crack the shell with your teeth, spit out the shell, eat the seed…), how to be a defensive driver, etc….

He’s taught me quite a bit. I even inherited his talent of telling an entire joke and completely forgetting to tell the punch line. I inherited his distaste for board games and video games. I gained his love for people and to know them more deeply. I inherited his love for information – he was a history major – he’s always looking up facts or rattling off Facebook statuses which naturally he wants to know someone’s facebook history 😉 . Not because he is a Facebook addict, but because he likes to know just what is going on. I also inherited his stubbornness. If you know me at all, you know I can be a little ridiculous sometimes. The “it’s my way or the highway” mentality, yeah, I’m working on that….and yeah, I got it from my father.

There is so much of me that I can attribute directly to my father, but one of the main things I can attribute is my love for truth and my desire to seek it out.  My father is a learner. No he is not perfect, but he sure does enjoy learning about who Christ is and what it means to walk in the love Christ has lived out tangibly for us on this earth.

I find myself doing what my father does. I am always googling. In fact, a side-story, when I first moved into my brother and sister-in-law’s place, they asked me if I knew anything about orchids, and I said no, but immediately, I hopped on google and tried to find the answer for them. I know that isn’t about the gospel and the Lord and grace, etc., but it shows a little sneak peak into who I am because of my father. I love to learn about the Lord. I love to research and read books and study the Bible. If it wasn’t for my father, I would not have the desire to learn like I do.

So, in honor of father’s day, thank you, Dad! I love you! Thank you for the influence you have directly had on my life. I cannot thank you enough for changing my life the way you and your beautiful wife have!

Sorry, dad, I had to do it! 🙂

To Be Continued… 🙂

Friends are a special thing.

I took my friendships for granted for several recent years of my life.

As a single college graduate, that is now – thankfully –  a different story.

There is something about a good friend to walk with through life. Someone to give you a good kick in the butt and tell you are acting silly when you are acting too cowardly to make friends in a new social setting. Someone to make you excited about things you are uncertain of. Someone who you can share embarrassing moments with and know that it wont affect your relationship. Someone to walk into a new setting with and know that they are a constant in your life – unchanging. Someone to be that “wind beneath your wings” as the song goes.

I have several friends who have been that for me over my lifetime. Mostly girls. A few guys. All very special to me. These friends are people who I will never take for granted again. These friends are people who I will support and walk hand-in-hand with until the day I die.

Ecclesiastes says it well

“There was a man all alone; he had neither son nor brother. There was no end to his toil, yet his eyes were not content with his wealth. “For whom am I toiling,” he asked, “and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment?” This too is meaningless—a miserable business! Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one  to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:8-12).

So, I wrote a ‘non-negotiable’ list not too long ago for the next guy I date. Basically, this is a list of things I want in a man and are sincerely non-negotiable in my book. He doesn’t have it = RED FLAG!! Well not entirely. A lot of the things listed are written out in detail. Even Matthew McConaughey can’t live up to those standards 😉 …totally joking!

It got me thinking. I am requiring all of these things from a human being who is flawed and imperfect, but I can’t even live these things out myself. These are expectations that only God could achieve, really. Soooo, first of all, grace needs to be lavished on others because I have been given so much grace (Ephesians 4:32 – “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you). Second of all, It make me think through the way I am living now. I am no where near to living up to the standard I am placing on others. How could I place such a high standard on others, when I can’t even get one of these right for a weeks time?! Therefore, it has now become my new “goal” list for the next couple of months and years of my life. I won’t be perfect at these things, just like a possible man in my future wont, but I am going to keep striving for these things in my life.

So here’s my ever-changing list…

1) WISE – thinks before acts. Slow to speak, slow to get angry, quick to listen. Seeks out counsel wiser than himself. Is not driven by his own desires but puts off his own desires for the good of those around him and to honor the Lord.
2) Outgoing and social – loves to entertain and welcomes guests, has deep friendships, able to hold a conversation with just about anyone.
3) Gospel-centered and driven – his life is guided by the Gospel.
4) Adventurous and willing to try new things – won’t settle for the same ol’, same ol’! Wants to try new restaurants, go on crazy wild dates, spontaneous but also a planner, creative, wants to go on trips and camp and hike and be “adventurous”!
5) Learner – seeks out counsel from older men, peers, and those younger than himself. Reads books. expands his mind and worldview within the scope of the Bible!
6) Loves traveling – enjoys different cultures, observing them, and serving them. Serving people in general.
7) Willing to correct me and push back on my ideas. Not intimidated by my stubbornness and strong-willed personality.
8) Positivity – balances out my cynical attitude.
9) Trust and jealousy – I can have guy friends, he can have girl friends – trust, trust, trust!! Trusts the Lord first and foremost so trusting me by trusting the Lord – also recognizes boundaries with the opposite sex, but doesn’t de-friend females and force me to de-friend males.Once again, is wise.
10) Faithfulness – Doesn’t make empty promises. Actions back up his words. Usually has less words and verbal promises, but actions take the place of needing to speak (for most – not all – cases).
11) Encourages vulnerability but within reason. Protects my heart, which means that sometimes he also discourages vulnerability and intimacy if the relationship is needing to slow down (assuming the context is a dating relationship still, not marriage).
12) Protects me – my heart, emotions, spirituality, etc.
13) Intentional in ministry and passionate about it. A passion that is specific not just general/broad. Knows the gifts that the Lord has given him and uses those to build up the church.
14) Within the previous answer, has a servants heart. Desires to serve others to exemplify Christ and to make much of Him, not to make much of his own self.
15) This one is kind of shallow, but well dressed. 😉 (not really a non-negotiable, but I can be hopeful).
16) Sense of humor – easy-going.
17) Cares about having a healthy lifestyle. I feed off of those around me [no pun intended 😉 ]. If those around me care about having a healthy lifestyle, I care about having a healthy lifestyle.

. . . .

To Be Continued… 🙂

Yesterday night I did something really silly…I’ll get to that in a minute…

So, I moved to Orange County 3 weeks ago and haven’t really found a church family to be involved in yet. So, my friends right now are my sister-in-law and brother and my co-workers (who I am SO incredibly grateful for, by the way). This is very different for me coming out of college surrounded by all of my close friends literally 24/7.

People don’t talk about the difficulties of post-college life. They talk about how wonderful it is to be independent. How great it is to have a full-time job!

Well, I am here to say, post-graduation is not anywhere close to being in heaven like people claim. Don’t get me wrong, I love my full-time job. It is great working with the people I work with and I love getting to provide great memories for people by renting them a beach home. I love working 100 yards from the beach. I love getting to live with my brother and sister and the chance to get to know them better as an adult.

It’s just not as easy as people make it out to be. Responsibility is hard. Getting up at 7 on a Saturday is not ideal. Paying car insurance payments and for oil changes is not fun. Saving your money instead of spending it on anything and everything you want is not fun. It is hard. Living in an apartment complex where you don’t know your neighbors is weird and sometimes awkward.

All that to say, I am craving the community I had 4 weeks ago. I am craving that close-knit, christian community where I can be real with people around me and not have to awkwardly smile and wave to my neighbors while I walk up the stairs to dodge their hockey game with their kids (which was adorable, I might add!!).

That community can happen in an apartment complex outside of the CBU bubble, but it is 100 times harder to create. I’m working on getting past my uncomfortable feelings and forcing myself to make friends! Stay tuned for that…

So, my silly story…

I was driving into chick-fil-a yesterday for dinner and me and a van came up to the intersection at the same time. I let her go first and she smiled and waved with gratitude and such a huge smile on her face. I was genuinely happy when I saw her reaction (if you know anything about OC, drivers are a little crazy sometimes and not always that quick to hand out such an excited smile AND a wave). As I pulled behind her, I read her license plate cover and it said Compassbiblechurch.org. So of course I looked it up while I was waiting in line on my phone (thank God for smart phones). It sounded like a pretty great church!

Anyways, She got her food, and I got my sandwich and since I only had a sandwich I was quickly following her out of the parking lot. As we turned onto the main road, I thought, I wonder where she is going? Maybe she is going to church and I can meet her and we can be friends? So, what did I do, you ask? Well of course I began following her… (dont judge me!!!)

After about 5 minutes of following her, I came to my senses. Sarah…YOU ARE A CRAZY PERSON!!!! YOU CAN’T JUST FOLLOW SOMEONE BECAUSE THEY HAVE A CHRISTIAN LICENSE PLATE COVER!

So, I made a u-turn and began driving back in the direction of my house – yes I drove out of my way to follow this lady (I am crazy!!!). I stopped by McDonalds and Redbox and rented the vow. I got home, ate my chicken sandwich and Reese’s McFlurry, and watched the vow and drowned in my sorrows (dramatic, I know)!

I share this story to show how very important community is – genuine, god-following community! When you can cultivate such deep friendships and community with people all heading in the same direction – toward Christ – it becomes very meaningful.

I cherish my church back in the IE. I cherish my friendships back at the little bubble of CBU. I cherish my close-knit family! The beauty of the community I had there is that it can be cultivated here. With a little blood, sweat, and tears, I can have community just like the ones I had back home. With a little elbow grease, I can cherish and love people where I am now. That is the beauty of Christ and his cross. Like Ephesians 2 says, he has broken the wall of hostility and made peace. I can now drive down the road and have a connection with the lady in the van next to me who I know nothing about. Yes, I know it was creepy even if we are connected in Christ and I don’t suggest it to anyone to do. But, that community is beautiful and it is worth longing for and desiring. It is worth that commitment and connection. It is worth the elbow grease, blood, sweat, and tears…and I’m sure there will be many in this process!

This Sunday I will make a venture out to a church to see how I can be apart of their body.

To Be Continued… 🙂