The Struggle is Real…

One area in life I have always struggled in is prayer. Consistent prayer time… this past Wednesday, the speaker at my moms group shared about praying. She shared that normally we just spout off requests without ever acknowledging God or thanking him. And, even further, we rarely confess our sins to God. It all rang so true for me. THIS WAS ME TO A “T”…… 😳

I decided I needed to make a change… so, this week, I started implementing the ACTS prayer in my daily bible readings, and it has been so uplifting!

ACTS stands for:

Adoration

Confession

Thanksgiving

Supplication

Easy enough, right? Well no…

Initiallly, I began by just trying to say them in my head. Well, that didn’t work. We are in the process of moving so at any given time, I have a billion and one things floating through my head on top of the billion and one things that were already floating there.

So, I decided to write it out so I would stay focused and not drift off to my todo list….BEST DECISION EVER!

Writing these things down has been amazing! Here’s an example from my journal this week:

Adoration- “God you are omniscient – All knowing! You know everything that is going to happen before it ever happens.” “God you are omnipotent – all powerful! You hold the whole world in your hands.” “God, you are a good good father. I can trust you with my life because you care so deeply for me.”

Confession – “God, I confess that I have not been trusting you with this house buying process. I have been anxious and worrying. But I know you are a good father and you have brought us to this place and will continue to protect us. You promise that even as you clothe the lilies of the field and feed the birds of the air, you will provide for our needs too!”

Thanksgiving – “God, thank you for loving me despite my fickle heart that doesn’t trust you. Thank you for giving me grace when I lose my patience. Thank you that you have given me a roof over my head, AC window units for this blistering hot day, a fridge full of food, a wonderful husband who works so incredibly hard and loves me deeply, a son to bring joy to my life and a growing baby in my belly.”

Supplication – “Please help the rest of this house buying process to go smoothly. Help me to continue to trust you and to not have an anxious heart worrying about things that are not in my control. Help me to be patient and kind and loving to those around me. Help me to be intentional with my new neighbors. Please give my current neighbors a wonderful replacement!”

It has been so encouraging to take care of the first things first… Going to God is most important and without trusting him first by praying to him, we are allowing fear and worry take the driver’s seat and God to take the back seat.

I encourage all of you who are like me and struggling with prayer to get a notebook or journal and start with the ACTS prayer. Adore God for who he is, confess any sin against God or others, thank him for whatever he is doing in your life or provisions he has provided, and finally supplication – ask him for things that you desire, need help with, are struggling with… It will be life changing!

Peets Coffee, the Ocean, and God…

Some days, I just go and sit by the ocean. Just me (and Jackson, but he’s usually sleeping in the back seat).

I pull up along PCH, keep the A/C running, and listen to the man on the Bible app read to me the Bible. It is refreshing. It restores my soul.

A few years ago, I would leave work and race to get down to the beach for the sunset. I remember sitting there after a long day and just breathing in the salt air – breath in…breath out… breath in… breath out… peace.

Recently, I have been driving down after I have gotten my Peet’s coffee (the way to my heart) and after Jackson has fallen asleep on the drive down to the beach.

Today was one of those days. I was craving the ocean….craving that time with God.

I sat, listened to my bible, drank my coffee, and peered out at the vast ocean and remembered once again how small I am and how great my God is. My problems are only so small and so fleeting.

Today, I was listening to 1 Samuel 8 where Israel begs Samuel for a (human) king (verses having God rule as king over them). Samuel is quite disappointed because his two sons have turned away from the Lord, and as 1 Samuel 8:3 says, “[they] did not walk in his ways but turned aside after gain. They took bribes and perverted justice.”

As a mother, if Jackson had done that I would be crushed. Imagine living your life following after God to only have your sons not walk with God and to even go so far as to accept bribes and pervert justice…that would be devastating. And then to top it off, the nation that God has appointed you (HA, so glad I don’t actually have a nation to judge) to judge decides they want an imperfect person to be king over them because they think (the perfect, almighty) God isn’t doing a good enough job – basically not doing what they want when they want it done.

I was listening to that thinking how many times the people around me have done things that disappoint me. I tend to have expectations for people that are pretty grand. I don’t expect perfection, but pretty darn close. When people do wrong, I take it personally because I have such high hopes for them. I want the best for them.

Today as I was listening, God was teaching me something as he taught Samuel thousands of years ago. He says, “Obey the voice of the people in all that they say to you, for they have not rejected you, but they have rejected me from being king over them,” (1 Samuel 8:7 ESV). As Samuel took their rejection personally, I have taken rejection personally. But God says something different. When people fail, it is not against us, it is against Him. I have followed God and trusted in Him, and when things go wrong, if I am truly following God, it is not against me, it is against God.

I think that is why in Ephesians, Paul tells us as women to ‘submit to your own husbands, AS TO THE LORD,’ (Ephesians 5:22-23 ESV) and to ‘[submit] to one another out of reverence for Christ,” (Ephesians 5:21 ESV). Samuel was submitting to the Lord as he was leading the Israelites. The Israelites rejected God and turned away from him (SO. MANY. TIMES). But God reminded Samuel that it was his job to follow God and instruct the people; it was the people’s job and choice whether they were going to follow God or not.

I think this is true in our own lives as well. We follow God and want the people around us to follow God. We put expectations on the people who we are walking through life with. I’m following God so they should too. Or, I am following God so they shouldn’t hurt me. God reminds us, no, we follow God solely to please him, not to dictate how our world, or the people in our world, will turn out. Don’t take rejection personally. Don’t take pain and hurt from others personally.

Israel ended up getting the human king they asked for. They also got all of the consequences that came along with it as God tells them they will get. Taxes, corruption, pain, etc… People around us will choose things that we don’t always like or they will choose not to follow God, they will hurt us, and we will experience pain because of the choices they have made. But, if we are following God, he will reward us for that in His time. It may not be until we see him face-to-face after we leave this earth, but regardless, we will get our reward.

So, I suppose, as I was sitting in my car at the beach this morning, peering out at the ocean sipping my coffee, God was teaching me, it will be okay. Pain is temporary; Following God is eternal. The problems we face in this world and the hurt done to us is so small compared to eternity with him.

And, as the corny Christian radio DJ reminded me this morning: “take heart, [he has] overcome the world,” (John 16:33, ESV).